Fitzrovia’s beloved local publication, The Fitzrovian, is about to get a little more avant-garde. We are delighted to announce the opening of The Fitzrovia Foyer Gallery, a daring new venture into the world of contemporary art. The gallery, located on the ground floor of our esteemed newspaper offices, promises to make waves with its inaugural exhibition: “Oil Be Seeing You”, a provocative solo show by the critically debated artist Solly Hogwed.
Hogwed, whose work has been described as “a visceral exploration of humanity’s greasy underbelly,” crafts nude sculptures using oil painstakingly gathered from Cuban oil slicks. Yes, you read that correctly. These sculptures are as slippery as they are subversive. Solly spent five years in Cuba armed with a snorkel, a sieve, and a dogged determination to harvest crude oil from spills along the coastline. Her rationale? “Oil is the blood of modern society, and I want to show that humanity is drowning in it—preferably naked,” Hogwed explained during a phone call punctuated by the sound of something being vigorously scrubbed.
The exhibition will feature several of her most iconic pieces, including “Petroleum Venus”, a reclining nude made entirely from crude oil molded onto a frame of driftwood, and “Oiled Apollo”, a towering figure that seems to simultaneously shimmer and slump under its own weight. Hogwed’s pièce de résistance, “The Birth of Slippery Adam”, features a life-sized oil-coated figure climbing out of what can only be described as a very eco-conscious puddle.
The show has already generated considerable buzz among Fitzrovia’s cultural elite. Several eminent collectors have confirmed their attendance at the opening night, including Sir Trembley Willoughby-Wood, who once famously described Solly Hogwed’s work as “an exquisite commentary on both the frailty of humanity and the practical nightmare of cleaning your shoes.” Also expected is Lady Ethel Plimmsley-Borque, known for her private collection of art made from recycled industrial waste, and tech billionaire Crispin Gloop, who called Solly “the Duchamp of environmental disasters.”
Rumors abound that even Hollywood royalty might attend the opening, as Hogwed’s sculptures have recently been acquired for the private villa of none other than Lacey Pretzelbaum, star of Fast & Fabulous: Oil Tycoon’s Revenge.
Editor-in-Chief of The Fitzrovian, Lionel Puggins, is understandably thrilled about this new chapter in the paper’s history. “We’ve always believed that journalism and art are kindred spirits. Also, the ground floor had a terrible damp problem, and this seemed like a creative solution,” Puggins said at a press briefing held beside a suspiciously sticky test sculpture.
The Fitzrovia Foyer Gallery will fling open its oil-smudged doors next Friday at 7 PM. Visitors are advised to wear practical footwear and bring a towel—just in case. As Solly Hogwed herself puts it: “Art should make you uncomfortable. And a little slippery.”
Don’t miss your chance to slide into this groundbreaking new show. Admission is free, though donations of cleaning supplies are greatly appreciated.
