Serving Fitzrovia since 1066
In a fiery gastronomic mishap that could only be described as "a bit too hot to handle," local curry enthusiast and amateur spice conqueror, Barry Blazington, found himself in a spot of bother after daringly sampling the infamous "Nuclear Inferno" curry at the Fitzrovia Curry and Pork Pie eatery. The ill-fated evening began innocently enough,…
In an extraordinary display of sprightly athleticism, octogenarian Bea Pollinator triumphed in the heart-pounding Portland Place Oxford Circus Dash, leaving spectators in awe and her competitors in the dust. The race, an annual event testing the mettle of participants as they sprint from Portland Place to the bustling nexus of Oxford Circus, drew a motley…
In a brazen attempt to blur the lines between political diplomacy and reality television, Fitzrovia TV (FTV) is setting its sights on the pinnacle of entertainment: "Prime Ministers in a Swamp." This daring show, slated to redefine the boundaries of governance and showbiz, aims to gather serving prime ministers and presidents from around the world…
In a world teeming with innovative solutions, one Fitzrovian inventor has emerged as a beacon of hope for those battling the bulge. Margorie Quiltt, the mastermind behind a string of quirky inventions, has unveiled her latest marvel: the SlimSuit, a revolutionary fat reduction suit designed to curb those overindulgent moments! Crafted from space-age aluminium, the…
In a bizarre twist of digital sorcery, the formidable SEO experts at Fitzrovia’s top-notch optimization agency managed to weave such a potent online spell that local florist "Here and Fleur" was inundated with a virtual stampede of eager online shoppers. However, the astonishing success story took a unfortunate turn as the virtual rush transformed into…
In a whirl of suds and squeaky-clean excitement, a new sport has emerged from the heart of Marylebone: Competitive Dishwasher Emptying. This adrenaline-fueled domestic challenge has quickly captivated the local community, transforming the mundane chore into a riveting, high-stakes competition. The brainchild of local inventor and kitchen connoisseur, Douglas Sudsman, Competitive Dishwasher Emptying turns the…
Rev your engines and mark your calendars, because the heart of London is about to witness the spectacle of a lifetime with the inaugural Fitzrovia Grand Prix! Buckle up as high-octane excitement descends upon the historic streets for a racing extravaganza like no other. This summer, Fitzrovia will transform into a high-speed racetrack as roaring…
In a shocking turn of events at the heart of British politics, a tea-time scandal has sent ripples through the corridors of power. The esteemed Prime Minister, known for decisive policies and diplomatic prowess, now faces scrutiny over a rather controversial culinary choice – placing cream before jam on his scone. This audacious act was…
In an unforeseen parliamentary skirmish, the infamous House of Commons Rolo Eating Team has thrown down the chocolatey gauntlet in a contest against their counterparts, the dignified House of Lords. The rivalry, believed to have been sparked by a Rolo-related faux pas during a particularly heated debate on fiscal policy, has escalated into a high-stakes…
It is with great sorrow that we bid farewell to Samson Cornichon, a beloved resident of Fitzrovia, who, at the age of 93, pedaled his way into the eternal horizon. His life was a testament to innovation and unexpected friendships. Samson made his indelible mark in history as the first man in England to ever…